Author's note: MY VERY FIRST SEX FIC. *confettis & balloons effect.
but it's not really detailed or anything (i sucked writting about detailed sex) just enough to pass as R-18 (plus, i think, yan WILL kill me if i went into details). haha.
I decided this would be a XiAnne pairing. surprising huh? this is the result of something she (Yan) told me. hahaha.
Yan, kahibaw na ka unsa to. oh and im giving you the honor of giving it the title. bitaw, i can't think of a good title man gud. i was thinking like "the power of Sex" or "how sex solves everything" or "the beauty of sex" but good thing i still have a little sanity in me. hahaha. so yan, you take ropes in making the title.
you might be confused since i used both a third person's POV and Yan's POV in this. i indicated whose POV it is to help you. the lines that are BOLD & ITALIZICED, are her thoughts.
BONUS: watch out for a surprise POV. hehehe.
----
The couple walked into the banquet together but he was gone from her side the instant he saw a familiar face. She was the type of wife who served as evidence that her husband was a hot-blooded, heterosexual male who could one day be a family man (if he felt like it) but in the mean time, could get hot sex whenever he wanted. he was that godly.
She grabbed a glass of champagne and (tried to) mingled but she wasn’t talkative or in a good mood either.
Junsu came back from Japan and she had not even seen his face as he walked in the door before commanding her to "get dressed, get pretty, we’re going out."
They've been married for 4 years. They didn’t even make it through their honeymoon happily. She hate his guts and he probably hates her back.
On this particular night, she take things as they come, but the crowning moment was when a scantily clad girl asked him who she was and he actually said “Oh, that’s just my wife.”
Fuck you too, you bastard.
They got home that night after a silent return drive in his car. He would never open the door for her, so Gryanne made sure to get out of the car before he does and open the front door herself before he can let it close in her face.
She head straight upstairs, pulled her dress off and took a shower.
Junsu strolls into the bathroom right behind her and stops short when he sees his wife in her naked glory, turning on the water.
“I need the shower.” he says.
“I’m taking a shower.” she says. Obviously. but he did not need to her that.
“Yan, I just got home, I haven’t had a shower since yesterday morning and I’ve been on three planes in the last 48 hours. Can I please take a fucking shower?”
“Sure.”
He gives her the strangest look at the immediate compliance and walked out of the bathroom without another word.
Sure you can have the shower. You can also sleep on the couch too.
She locked the bedroom door.
The next few days passed painfully. She hated it when he’s home. She tries to avoid him and tiptoes around her own house. This is hardly his house — he’s home less than half the year.
She remembers a few years back he tried to sell her place. He said it wasn’t glamorous enough, even though it had more square footage than his "sought after" condo unit put together. She fought him every step of the way. tried to bargain with him for days when he tried to put paperwork through with a real estate company before she finally lost her cool.
“This is my house, Junsu! I don’t give a shit where you live, but you can’t sell what belongs to me! Let me have one goddamn thing of my own!” she had screamed. He brought out the very worst in her.
He finally gave up and bought a house on the coast, which is where he stayed most of the time he wasn’t "home". He was on business often enough that no one asked why they lived apart and was famous enough that he could make excuses even if they did ask. She had long ago stopped wondering if he slept around. He had needs too and he could have anyone he wanted, so she suspected he had a lot of "visitors" at the house on the coast. As for them, it’s been around two years since they’ve slept together.
How did this happen?
[Gryanne's POV]
I came to my senses, that’s how and it’s that simple. I was madly in love and he wasn’t. He never loved me. He used me and his punishment was marriage. I can’t say that I was punished worse than him, considering we can never divorce. we’re both stuck in a place we hate but he’s a society darling. he’s got the voice of a god, and he uses it and if he fools around, he’ll be forgiven. That’s something I can never do.
[end of POV]
They managed not to have any altercations for all of 18 hours. a record. he came down in the middle of the day and walked up to her while she was reading a book.
“Aren’t you going to do the laundry?” he asked.
She looked up slowly, sensing he is pissed off.
“There’re dirty clothes all over the bedroom, can’t you wash them once in a blue moon? You sit here all day doing nothing and you can’t find time to throw some damn cloth in the washer?”
“I do my laundry.” she said calmly.
“Gryanne, I don’t have time for this. I need some clean shirts and I have to go out tonight. I’ll be gone in three days and you can go back to your sedimentary lifestyle.” He walked off.
She was furious.
Oh sure, I’ll do your laundry, honey. No problem.
She washed his white shirts and red shirts together.
Why does she hate him so much?
[Gryanne's POV]
I was young, younger than him, impressionable, dependent. He swept me off my feet and I thought he had pure love for me. He was charming and handsome and funny. He sang for me and shared his dreams and his eyes sparkled and I adored him. He stole my virginity on a blanket under the stars and I thought it was all romance and happy endings.
I had gotten pregnant.
When my father found out, he demanded that Junsu marry me immediately.
He refused.
I was so stupid that I still loved him. he told me that he just wasn’t ready, that we were too young and I thought he would come for me one day on his own. But my father pushed the issue and Junsu finally came outright and told my father in no uncertain words that he didn’t want me. He didn’t love me and he didn’t want to spend the rest of his life with me.
The wedding was three weeks later. Junsu had avoided my every call and as I stood with him in front of hundreds of people, he didn’t even look me in the eye.
Maybe it was cruel that he was forced to marry just as his career was taking off. Maybe I tied him down and ruined his freedom.
But did he think I wanted to be with a man who hated me?
[end of POV]
Their marriage was rocky even at the very start. Heck, it started falling apart even before it began.
A few days after the wedding, he flew to Japan to promote his debut album, leaving her all alone at "their" place. It would have been nice to have your husband caressing your back when you have morning sickness, telling you that it will be alright. How nice it would feel to have someone with you everytime you go for pre-natal check ups, seeing the baby on the screen and hearing it's heartbeat. But instead, he was in another country, miles away.
She was approaching her third month when ehr felt a terrible pain and blood was streaming down her thighs. She was immediately rushed to the hospital.
She was told that she had a miscarriage. It was painful but not having your husband beside you at that time made it hurt even more.
All she got was one lousy phone call from him asking how she was and then telling her that his stay in another country was extended.
So she returned to her normal life, or what's left of it. She concentrated on her work and found success & happiness in it, far opposite from their marriage.
She returned late one night and Junsu was still up, downing a glass of alcohol. His shirt was brand new — he’d obviously gone out earlier to buy one after the laundry disaster she left him with, even though there were probably tens of shirts he could have worn still hanging in his closet.
He glanced up at her while she tried to move silently past him to the stairs.
“Yan,”
She stopped.
He swirled the liquid in his glass.
“Why are you like this?” he asked.
She had considered this on occasion.
Why couldn’t I let him live in peace?
She turned slowly to look at him.
“Why is this so miserable?” he asked. He didn’t look at her, keeping his eyes on his drink “Why are you so determined to make me hate myself?”
She doubted that he hated himself. She didn’t doubt that he hated her.
“Because you can have anything you want, Junsu. And I don’t want to let you forget that you ruined my life too.”
His jaw dropped. He hadn’t been expecting that.
She hadn’t meant to say it.
“Yan…”
You’re a bitch? I hate you? I want to pretend we never met?
“You used to want to make me happy.” a hint of sadness & regret in his voice.
Hah! Yeah, ages ago, years ago, before we were married, perhaps! When did you ever want to make me happy?
“You didn’t use to be mean-hearted.” he did not meant it as an accusation, but the obvious truth.
“Yeah, well I didn’t used to be married to you.” she said.
She went straight upstairs.
It was getting late but Junsu wasn’t coming to bed. She had changed into some pajamas and sat on the bed, staring forlornly into space.
She hated the person that she had become. What was the point in living like this? It wasn’t making her happy, and surely it was making him unhappy. It’s not like she was accomplishing something by being such a heartless bitch. He never came home because she made his life hell, but she wasn’t happy being alone either. It wasn’t her goal to convince him to stay away.
She didn’t want to live like that anymore. In fact, she had felt that way for a long time, but didn’t know what to do about it. What could she possibly say? If she even attempted an apology, he would shove it back in her face and reminded her that he never wanted her.
She sat thinking about it and realized that he was leaving again soon. Meaning, she would be alone for weeks or months again. She was becoming aware that she was not satisfied with just going to sleep tonight. They had a painful and pointless past, but he was her husband and it was rare for him to be home. she had a right to being with him, no matter how he felt about her.
She got up off the bed and went to the door, opening it slowly.
[Junsu's POV]
I was sitting in the big armchair, a lamp switched on beside and a book on my legs.
I glanced up as Gryanne walked over to me.
She took me by surprise when she climbed onto my lap, sitting right on top of my reading material and leaned down to give me a blistering kiss.
I reciprocated instantly, and the moment stretched--- and stretched---
“Yan,” I broke away. “What are you doing?” I searched her eyes for the reason of the sudden behavior.
She ignored me, dragging my mouth to hers again. My fingers swirling in her hair and caressing the back of her neck.
“Junsu,” she gasped. “Please pretend you don’t hate me for one night. I’m sorry about earlier. Just, please—.”
Her words cut me like a newly sharpened knife.
“I don’t ha--,” I tried to assure her but she captured my lips again.
Her bottom was rubbing over my slowly hardening member and I was getting uncomfortable sitting beneath her. I placed my hands on her hips trying to hold her still but no thoughts of making her stop, and she certainly wasn’t pulling away from me.
I was getting hard, hot & impatient. I lifted her and she wrapped her legs around my waist for leverage. I carried her upstairs.
[end of POV]
[Gryanne's POV]
The feeling of falling onto the bed beneath him felt unreal.
His lips were at my neck and I was holding him close, barely giving him enough freedom to move, but somehow we rolled and pulled and tugged until our clothes were mostly discarded. He was running his hands through my long dark hair and I almost felt my eyes rolling back in my head. I suddenly remembered the very first time we slept together.
“Yan. You. Are. So beautiful.” he gasped. He sounded close to tears, and I realized I felt the same way.
What did this mean?
He leaned down to kiss me as he prepared to push himself between my legs, but I turned my head to the side. I knew that having lip contact made sex better for him. it was like double sensory overload for him, but I hated it. I’d never told him that. It made me feel trapped when I wanted to be free.
Junsu entered me and I felt seering pain on my area. I bit my lips hard and dug my fingers unto his back. It had been a while since we copulated and I forgot how big he is down there. He had burried himself deep inside me and gave me time to adjust to his size.
"Please don't move yet" I pleaded. my eyes still shut close because of the pain.
"I wont. I wont move until you're ready" he assured me and tried to distract me from the pain by tracing kisses from my jaw down to my throat and my collarbone. He started to carress my breast and I gasped as he suddenly took one in his mouth and sucked on it.
The distraction worked and I felt myself relaxing. I bucked up my hips to tell him I was ready.
He understood what i meant. With his hands low on my hips he started to move. He pulled out almost all the way then pushed back in slowly, achingly slow. He did it again and again with increasing speed and force, burrying himself deeper and deeper inside me.
I threw my head back and just felt him inside me, giving me intense pleasure. My insides twitched and I couldn’t stop moaning.
We were both whispering each other's name with mixed longing & lust.
[end of POV]
Junsu was lying on his back, his head tilted a little to one side — towards his wife — while she was on her stomach beside him. She tucked an arm around his bicep, hugging him closer as they slept.
She was woken when she felt her husband slipping away from her, extracting his arm from her grip.
“Junsu,” she said sleepily. she threw her arm across his chest weakly, making him stay in his place.
He stilled and after a moment relaxed back onto his pillow. One hand brushed over her hair.
She moved and was now half sprawled above him. She settled her head on his chest, hearing his heartbeat.
He wrapped an arm across & caressed her back.
They stayed like that for several minutes. appreciating the silence and understanding the meaning of what had happened earlier. Both are aware that things will definitely change now. Both unsure where the relationship is going next.
“What happened to us?” she asked quietly, breaking the silence. Her voice was a mix of tears and resignation, admitting to her part in their disaster of a marriage.
She was expecting him to say anything, anything else, other than what he said next.
“Nothing we can’t fix, Yan.”
-END-
Labels: by: suzy [hot_pink]
